Thursday, November 01, 2012
IM BACK
Its lunch now, markets have closed. I cant believe i have been brought back to this forsaken blog. Its curious really how life brings you back to the past when a greater power up there thinks it might do you good.
Well, looking back, it tickles to know how seriously i took my life in the past. The older i get, the less seriously i view the world and myself and somehow that really makes me a happier person. In fact i think a major transition only happened in the last couple of years. It could be that i have learnt to let go and live life in the present or have become lazy and unmotivated. I guess it might be the latter.
Its amazing where life brings you sometimes. I have been extremely blessed. Life has presented me with hurdles and challenges that on hindsight has left me with a greater awareness of who i am as a person and what i can deal with in life. It has also brought me massive strokes of luck when i needed it as well as taught me life lessons that have made me grow as a person. Despite some of the ruts ( that i hardly think of them as ruts anymore) has hit , life has worked out pretty well for me. I can only be grateful for what i have and thank my god for looking after me all these while.
Had i envisioned myself where i am today 6 years, 4 years, 2 years ago? No. Expectations were extremely different then. I guess thats part of growing up, knowing that plans dont necessarily come true and learning to adapt to circumstances and be happy for whatever opportunities that come your way. Taking every negative experience in a positive light also helps really.
Well, the main reason why i guess i have been brought back to this page is to remind myself of the fervour and motivation i had when i was younger. I have become too comfortable with what i have right now and that does not do justice to what has been given to me in life. Its about time i started to play hard and work harder.
Nat, its time to get out of your comfort zone and make sure that you do deserve the things you do have and at the same time learn to balance life the way it was meant to be. I am making this my personal endeavour for the coming year.
Its time :)
Well, looking back, it tickles to know how seriously i took my life in the past. The older i get, the less seriously i view the world and myself and somehow that really makes me a happier person. In fact i think a major transition only happened in the last couple of years. It could be that i have learnt to let go and live life in the present or have become lazy and unmotivated. I guess it might be the latter.
Its amazing where life brings you sometimes. I have been extremely blessed. Life has presented me with hurdles and challenges that on hindsight has left me with a greater awareness of who i am as a person and what i can deal with in life. It has also brought me massive strokes of luck when i needed it as well as taught me life lessons that have made me grow as a person. Despite some of the ruts ( that i hardly think of them as ruts anymore) has hit , life has worked out pretty well for me. I can only be grateful for what i have and thank my god for looking after me all these while.
Had i envisioned myself where i am today 6 years, 4 years, 2 years ago? No. Expectations were extremely different then. I guess thats part of growing up, knowing that plans dont necessarily come true and learning to adapt to circumstances and be happy for whatever opportunities that come your way. Taking every negative experience in a positive light also helps really.
Well, the main reason why i guess i have been brought back to this page is to remind myself of the fervour and motivation i had when i was younger. I have become too comfortable with what i have right now and that does not do justice to what has been given to me in life. Its about time i started to play hard and work harder.
Nat, its time to get out of your comfort zone and make sure that you do deserve the things you do have and at the same time learn to balance life the way it was meant to be. I am making this my personal endeavour for the coming year.
Its time :)
Friday, March 05, 2010
things not done yet
things not done yet:
lose weight,
find a direction,
find a more meaningful job,
abandon everything temporarily and go for a spontaneous back pack and come back a bankrupt,
lose weight,
study summore,
master another language,
ensure my brain doesnt rot and die
hmm... i have alot of things to do this year.. problem is.. will i ?
lose weight,
find a direction,
find a more meaningful job,
abandon everything temporarily and go for a spontaneous back pack and come back a bankrupt,
lose weight,
study summore,
master another language,
ensure my brain doesnt rot and die
hmm... i have alot of things to do this year.. problem is.. will i ?
Thursday, October 23, 2008
a few times i attempted to blog
each time was just futile
just stared at the screen not feeling any urge to type
not feeling the need i felt 5 mins ago
shall i blog abt this?
nah.
shall i blog abt that
bo liao.
guess its time to enrol into the boring old cow's club
each time was just futile
just stared at the screen not feeling any urge to type
not feeling the need i felt 5 mins ago
shall i blog abt this?
nah.
shall i blog abt that
bo liao.
guess its time to enrol into the boring old cow's club
from seoks blog
The “Best” Day of 2008October 22, 2008 by seokie
This post is necessary to record my best day of the year.
The day started at 0750, when I opened my eyes when my Donald Duck ringtone sang for about the 5th time and realised I overslept again. And last night’s sleep wasn’t exactly the most comfortable one because I had a slight fever from yesterday’s gay rain.
Then, I took a bus to school to attend a lecture I had wanted to skip because it is definitely useless. But the lecturer had to send us an e-mail to inform us that our Mid-Term Answer Booklets will be returned to us DURING THE LECTURE together with our scores. Fine. Got back the Mid-Term. No mean, no standard deviation. How am I supposed to do where I stand in the entire cohort? Idiots. And my retarded tutor deprived me of ONE MARK and I had to (nearly) shout at him to get back my deserved point. ARGH.
Met Ashley for “lunch” (that’s about the really best thing of the day) but the lunch crowd was so DISGUSTING I decided not to eat. Went for Macro Tutorial, and OF ALL DAYS, I didn’t bring my answers (I GOT IT DONE OKAY) when the lecturer stood in as tutor today. GREAT. What happened next? I had to pee very badly because the air-con was really fucking cold, and I got gastric pain from not eating lunch (like how often does that happen to me?). Went back to Deck with Ade and continued our FINANCIAL TUTORIAL 4.
We started at about 3.30pm. We went for consultation at about 5.30pm. Ade left at 9pm, without finishing the tutorial. NAT AND I STAYED UNTIL 10.20+pm.
And it was raining outside.
We called our respective family members, hoping that they would pity us and come to school and fetch us home. Because it was so late, and it was raining. But to our horror, they are ALL HEARTLESS. Various excuses were given. Whatever then, we decided to take a CAB.
Two cabs zoomed past us in NUS. Nat and I are not skinny AT ALL. Are the cabbies BLIND?
So Nat suggested that we take a bus out to the main road for higher cab frequency. We stood at the main road bus stop. 2 other cabs zoomed past us (2 cabs in about 20 minutes) like they were blind again.
Then we wondered. Did we do our assignment until we died without knowing we died?! That’s why people around us seemed unaware of our presence leh.
Or it was too dark, raining and the roads reflected badly. So Nat and I looked like trees (Body as the trunk; Desperately waving hands as the moving branches) so they all ignored us.
So we took a bus down further when the next bus came eons later.
Dropped at the most ulu-ated stop outside New Town Secondary School AND TADAAAAAAAA. THE ANGELIC CABBIE STOPPED FOR US!!!!!!!!!
Okay the uncle was VERY AMUSED by Nat’s running-about and my “AHAHAHAHAHA CAB” and wondered if we were on a treasure hunt. FUCK MAN HE WAS THE TREASURE! The uncle was really very funny. We drove past uniSIM and there was this really retarded driver who turned out from a junction when a bike was ZOOMING TOWARDS HER on the straight road. DUHHHH.
Guess what Uncle Cabbie did?
C: *points out middle finger* *#&$)(%^!)(#*$&(*!
Nat and I: HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHA.
He even offered his car for us to drive HAHAHA. WHAT FUCK.
He’s like the 3rd best thing that happened today - entertainment. HAHAHA!
What’s the 2nd best thing? Don’t tell you. =D
And then he didn’t charge the 30 cents of the total fare. So nice of you vulgar uncle. =)
ALRIGHT I AM DONE RANTING.
I’m going to sleeeeeeeeeep like mad tomorrow and skip Game Theory’s tutorial. Then I’ll wake up and work on my freaking History Term Paper, finish reading my Republic Book I for Philo tutorial on Friday morning and maybe take a nap when I feel like it in the afternoon.
9 more minutes to the end of the “MOST EXCITING” DAY OF 2008 WOOHOO!
This post is necessary to record my best day of the year.
The day started at 0750, when I opened my eyes when my Donald Duck ringtone sang for about the 5th time and realised I overslept again. And last night’s sleep wasn’t exactly the most comfortable one because I had a slight fever from yesterday’s gay rain.
Then, I took a bus to school to attend a lecture I had wanted to skip because it is definitely useless. But the lecturer had to send us an e-mail to inform us that our Mid-Term Answer Booklets will be returned to us DURING THE LECTURE together with our scores. Fine. Got back the Mid-Term. No mean, no standard deviation. How am I supposed to do where I stand in the entire cohort? Idiots. And my retarded tutor deprived me of ONE MARK and I had to (nearly) shout at him to get back my deserved point. ARGH.
Met Ashley for “lunch” (that’s about the really best thing of the day) but the lunch crowd was so DISGUSTING I decided not to eat. Went for Macro Tutorial, and OF ALL DAYS, I didn’t bring my answers (I GOT IT DONE OKAY) when the lecturer stood in as tutor today. GREAT. What happened next? I had to pee very badly because the air-con was really fucking cold, and I got gastric pain from not eating lunch (like how often does that happen to me?). Went back to Deck with Ade and continued our FINANCIAL TUTORIAL 4.
We started at about 3.30pm. We went for consultation at about 5.30pm. Ade left at 9pm, without finishing the tutorial. NAT AND I STAYED UNTIL 10.20+pm.
And it was raining outside.
We called our respective family members, hoping that they would pity us and come to school and fetch us home. Because it was so late, and it was raining. But to our horror, they are ALL HEARTLESS. Various excuses were given. Whatever then, we decided to take a CAB.
Two cabs zoomed past us in NUS. Nat and I are not skinny AT ALL. Are the cabbies BLIND?
So Nat suggested that we take a bus out to the main road for higher cab frequency. We stood at the main road bus stop. 2 other cabs zoomed past us (2 cabs in about 20 minutes) like they were blind again.
Then we wondered. Did we do our assignment until we died without knowing we died?! That’s why people around us seemed unaware of our presence leh.
Or it was too dark, raining and the roads reflected badly. So Nat and I looked like trees (Body as the trunk; Desperately waving hands as the moving branches) so they all ignored us.
So we took a bus down further when the next bus came eons later.
Dropped at the most ulu-ated stop outside New Town Secondary School AND TADAAAAAAAA. THE ANGELIC CABBIE STOPPED FOR US!!!!!!!!!
Okay the uncle was VERY AMUSED by Nat’s running-about and my “AHAHAHAHAHA CAB” and wondered if we were on a treasure hunt. FUCK MAN HE WAS THE TREASURE! The uncle was really very funny. We drove past uniSIM and there was this really retarded driver who turned out from a junction when a bike was ZOOMING TOWARDS HER on the straight road. DUHHHH.
Guess what Uncle Cabbie did?
C: *points out middle finger* *#&$)(%^!)(#*$&(*!
Nat and I: HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHA.
He even offered his car for us to drive HAHAHA. WHAT FUCK.
He’s like the 3rd best thing that happened today - entertainment. HAHAHA!
What’s the 2nd best thing? Don’t tell you. =D
And then he didn’t charge the 30 cents of the total fare. So nice of you vulgar uncle. =)
ALRIGHT I AM DONE RANTING.
I’m going to sleeeeeeeeeep like mad tomorrow and skip Game Theory’s tutorial. Then I’ll wake up and work on my freaking History Term Paper, finish reading my Republic Book I for Philo tutorial on Friday morning and maybe take a nap when I feel like it in the afternoon.
9 more minutes to the end of the “MOST EXCITING” DAY OF 2008 WOOHOO!
Sunday, June 01, 2008
ok got a job thanks to mr perky ass lai :) thanks siyan! treat u to nice sumptuous dinner one day k? work 9.5 hrs a day and yea. oh well.. lets not go into details. the main point of this holiday is the exercise and dieting ( that i have been failing miserably at ) as well as the fun im going to have( not that there is going to be much left cause i only have 10 days of hols left after my contract ends and i have to do bidding and shit)
But its ok, cause im still gonna play like siao, let all hell break loose and let the party animal in me come out. ITS TIME TO HAVE SOME SENSELESS STUPID AND SERIOUSLY NONSENSICAL FUN. like getting high. AHAHAHA oh well the main pt being do things that i dont usually allow myself to do during semester. like say.. hmm.. having fun.. yea man
sometimes i feel like im such a sadomasochist. i practice such self denial during semester i become repressed and angsty and a bloody no lifer. THATS ABT TO CHANGE BABY!
Theres a time and place for everything, and this being my last hols. im gonna try my best to have as much fun as possible! WHEEEEEEEE although i started looking for jobs/internships 3 days after exams cause cant help it la.. dont like feeling like a uselsess redundant piece of crap like a BAI JIA ZI! wheeeeee!
ok im blabbering.. my dog is going to be olde rthan me soon. i got to call him kor kor. and my sis is starting the " she is younger then u and at the bottom of the family's hierachy" indoctrination.
oh wells! ahahahahhaa
down to gym, orchard back and sleep! WHEEEEEE
But its ok, cause im still gonna play like siao, let all hell break loose and let the party animal in me come out. ITS TIME TO HAVE SOME SENSELESS STUPID AND SERIOUSLY NONSENSICAL FUN. like getting high. AHAHAHA oh well the main pt being do things that i dont usually allow myself to do during semester. like say.. hmm.. having fun.. yea man
sometimes i feel like im such a sadomasochist. i practice such self denial during semester i become repressed and angsty and a bloody no lifer. THATS ABT TO CHANGE BABY!
Theres a time and place for everything, and this being my last hols. im gonna try my best to have as much fun as possible! WHEEEEEEEE although i started looking for jobs/internships 3 days after exams cause cant help it la.. dont like feeling like a uselsess redundant piece of crap like a BAI JIA ZI! wheeeeee!
ok im blabbering.. my dog is going to be olde rthan me soon. i got to call him kor kor. and my sis is starting the " she is younger then u and at the bottom of the family's hierachy" indoctrination.
oh wells! ahahahahhaa
down to gym, orchard back and sleep! WHEEEEEE
Saturday, May 10, 2008
its amazing how we go to extremes to feel better. today i felt better after knowing that at least i was alive as compared to a certain person.
Its sad, disgusting and utterly pathetic to feel better our of someone elses unfortunate end.
sick.
Its sad, disgusting and utterly pathetic to feel better our of someone elses unfortunate end.
sick.
i cant believe the semester is still haunting me after its over.
after my last paper i have been having dreams with regards to the exams.
On the first two nights i dreamt that i overslept for the paper and studied for the wrong damn paper. Obviously, i woke up. And sheepishly realised that i was being an idiot cause my exams are over and went back to sleep.
Last night i dreamt that i was doing some sociology of indian family nonsense. And during my paper, they returned the micro paper which i failed miserably. i was so upset how i could have spent so much time know how to do most of it and yet screw up so badly cause of the format i went through the paper over and over again. In the end i didnt have time to finish my sociology of indian paper. Left 50% blank.
Finished my paper on monday night. Went for drinks at four seasons monday night with angelina bernice and elaine. Stupid elaine made me drink so much. Went out on Tuesday for harold and kumar with miss elaine cause she had free tickets. Spent the whole of wednesday and thursday continuing my search for internships to no avial :( went for theline buffet on thursday night. It was my cousins birthday. Seriously for 100 bucks per head they sure had damn alot of good food. But it was too much for me to stomach. Spent today feeling remorse abt yesterdays binge and went over to elaines house for popiah. Staying up tonight to finish my 3 weeks of german cause i skipped lessons for 3 weeks and have tonnes of hw to do.
and i offically got bored on wedensday.
i dunno why but i cant not have anything to do. i feel useless. and worried and anxious for my future which is increasingly looking to become set for failure.
then again enough of my emotional and mental back lash. you guys dont need this crap.
i just hope to feel free again.
free when i know everything is in order.
im so gonna fail this semester.
life sucks
after my last paper i have been having dreams with regards to the exams.
On the first two nights i dreamt that i overslept for the paper and studied for the wrong damn paper. Obviously, i woke up. And sheepishly realised that i was being an idiot cause my exams are over and went back to sleep.
Last night i dreamt that i was doing some sociology of indian family nonsense. And during my paper, they returned the micro paper which i failed miserably. i was so upset how i could have spent so much time know how to do most of it and yet screw up so badly cause of the format i went through the paper over and over again. In the end i didnt have time to finish my sociology of indian paper. Left 50% blank.
Finished my paper on monday night. Went for drinks at four seasons monday night with angelina bernice and elaine. Stupid elaine made me drink so much. Went out on Tuesday for harold and kumar with miss elaine cause she had free tickets. Spent the whole of wednesday and thursday continuing my search for internships to no avial :( went for theline buffet on thursday night. It was my cousins birthday. Seriously for 100 bucks per head they sure had damn alot of good food. But it was too much for me to stomach. Spent today feeling remorse abt yesterdays binge and went over to elaines house for popiah. Staying up tonight to finish my 3 weeks of german cause i skipped lessons for 3 weeks and have tonnes of hw to do.
and i offically got bored on wedensday.
i dunno why but i cant not have anything to do. i feel useless. and worried and anxious for my future which is increasingly looking to become set for failure.
then again enough of my emotional and mental back lash. you guys dont need this crap.
i just hope to feel free again.
free when i know everything is in order.
im so gonna fail this semester.
life sucks
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